People always ask me if they are trying to change by improving how they think and feel, do they have to let go of their friends who are more negative? The answer to this is yes and no. Obviously we can’t run from everyone because even though some people we know may be more negative, they may still have some good qualities we like about them. However, that being said, there may be some people we know who really are “toxic” and are so negative that it would be a good idea to greatly distance ourselves from them.
Solutions Regarding Friends
A good idea when it comes to people we don’t want to totally distance ourselves from is to just limit our time with them. Maybe we only spend an hour with them instead of 3 hours. Or, maybe when we call them to chat if the conversation starts to veer towards negativity, we do our best to change the subject.
The reason for all this is because when it comes to the Law of Attraction, since it’s always responding to us, giving us more circumstances and situations that match our vibration, we want to spend more time at a higher vibration. A higher vibration feels good and that’s where we want to be as much as possible. When we keep ourselves at a higher vibration then we attract more experiences that are high vibration experiences. We’ll even attract people who are more positive, and some of our friends who are more low vibration will fade away because they can tell you’re not a match with them anymore. So that’s why it’s important to spend more time with your more positive (high vibration) friends and less time with your more negative (low vibration) friends.
It’s also important to know that once we know how to deliberately keep ourselves at a raised vibration, lower vibration people won’t effect us as much because we’re feeling too good.
Always remember I offer a free first mini phone coaching session.
I was working with a client last night and she wanted to work on updating some negative thoughts she was having about her job. She knew that she had many thoughts that were not serving her and was anxious for me to help her change them to thoughts that would serve her. After talking with her I decided that the best process to use was one called the Clarity Through Contract process. She took a blank piece of paper and drew a line down the center. On one side she wrote “Contrast” and on the other side she wrote “Clarity”. On the contrast side she wrote down all the negative thoughts she was having about her job. After I helped her pinpoint the exact thought, she then went to the first one, crossed it out and on the clarity side, wrote the opposite thought. We did this for all the thoughts. When we were done we then did a desire statement and she read all her new thoughts. She was so relieved to have discovered which limiting thoughts were floating around her mind regarding her job and then to zap them and change them into positive thoughts. Now she will consciously think these new thoughts ever day, which will attract what she wants in relation to her job. It’s amazing what negative thoughts are floating around in our minds. Sometimes we don’t even realize they are until we start talking about different things. I had one of those pesky thoughts floating around my mind which said “you can only have a certain amount of good things happen to you, and then a bad thing will happen.” I don’t know where I picked that up along the way, but I did. Thank god I shot down that thought and now replaced it with “I can experience unlimited good and then continue to experience more good, and more good, and more good!” What thoughts are lurking around in your mind that are telling you there are limits to how much you can have, do, or be?
Yesterday I had a group coaching call and we were discussing the “finding a better feeling thought” process. It was great because one of the participants was having a health issue and whenever his health issue appeared his first thought was that he felt his body was betraying him. After discussing the situation I asked him if there was another thought he could think of that felt real to him, but was a little better than that thought. After a little resistance he did come up with another, and then another, and then another. I was so happy for him that he can now turn to a better feeling thought when his illness appears and I wouldn’t be surprised if he had less of the illness because of his improved thinking. Now he knows that there is a choice of how you think about something. Where can you find a better feeling thought with something that’s bothering you???